I was rushing through the white-tented terminal building at Denver International Airport when my attention was diverted – as if often is — by a storefront massage business. Checking my wristwatch, I calculated I had just enough time for a 20-minute chair massage.

I settled onto the light gray vinyl chair and placed my face inside the cushioned headrest. The massage therapist introduced himself. “I’m Lee,” he said. “But you can call me Sawbones.”

He must have seen the cartoon question mark floating above my head in an imaginary white bubble “Sawbones?”for he went on to tell me about himself.

Digging his thumbs into the back of my neck, Sawbones explained that massage was a new line of work for him.

“Do you like it?” I asked, my words muffled by the cushioned face rest.

“Yes, ma’am,” he said, revealing a slight rancher’s drawl. “I get to meet interesting people, especially here at the airport. A few weeks ago, I massaged the lawyer for the Oklahoma City Bomber. He was on his way to his client’s execution.” Sawbones paused, as if remembering the occasion. “He was a little tense.”

Although his comment demanded a sarcastic response, I couldn’t think of one fast enough. Instead, I asked Sawbones if he worked only at the airport.

“No, ma’am. I also have an office by the Stock Show Complex.”

“The Stock Show Complex?”

“Yes, ma’am. That’s because I have another business. Custom cowboy hats.”

The cartoon question mark re-appeared. “Cowboy hats?”

“Yes, ma’am. I sell them at the Grizzly Rose, the country-western bar north of downtown.”

I inhaled the rosemary scent of the massage oil and debated whether to prod Sawbones for more information. Since I was unlikely to meet another cowboy-hat-making-masseur in the near future, I asked him if his massage business was growing.

“Yes, ma’am. See, I do horses too.”

“Horses?” I asked, feeling like I was being sucked down a conversational rabbit hole.

“Yes, ma’am. Horses like massage. They can get testy though.”

“I’ll bet.” I pictured a blonde Palomino lying hooves up on a massage table.

As Sawbones kneaded my upper arms, he asked what I did for a living.

“I’m a writer,” I said. Actually, I didn’t say that, because just then, Sawbones’ fingers pushed my head into the headrest making my answer sound more like “Imamiffer.”

Sawbones was unfazed. “Really?!” he exclaimed. “I’m a writer too!” He said this as if we were distant cousins meeting at a genealogy conference. “I write scripts!”

“Scripts?”

“Yes, ma’am. See, I also perform in Wild West Shows.”

The rabbit hole was getting deeper by the second. “What kinds of things are in your shows?”

“Shoot-outs. Stuff like that. I have a friend who looks like Abraham Lincoln. He’s gonna be in our show tomorrow night.”

Now, I’ve never been that great at history but I’ve never really pictured Abe Lincoln in a shoot-out, except, of course, for the incident at Ford’s Theater. I was about to ask Sawbones how Abe figured into his act when he pulled my arms behind my back and away from my body as if dressing a chicken. “You sure got some knots under here,” he said, poking underneath my shoulder blades. I began to comprehend the testiness of his equine clients.

Soon, our 20-minutes was up and Sawbones handed me his business card. “Massage,” it read. “For Horses and Humans.”
“Just for future reference,” he added, “I also do home massage. It’s only 50 bucks and I bring my own table, oil, and CDs.” I accepted the card graciously even though I was fairly certain I’d never pay a man named Sawbones to tote oil and soft music into my house.

It’s been a week since my encounter with the custom-cowboy-hat-making, wild-west-show-performing, horse-and-human massage therapist and I can’t get him out of my mind.

Now, I know there are people who might find Sawbones a little low brow and unfocused. These people would assume Sawbones was a drifter who hadn’t found his true calling. But to me, Sawbones is wise. He can work indoors or out. He works with his hands and his mind. He also has built-in job security. The bottom could fall out of the cowboy hat market and Sawbones would still make it in the world.

Furthermore, Sawbones has already figured out what many of us spend our entire careers learning: How important it is to try new things. “Ma’am,” he said, “I do all these things because I promised myself I would never do the same boring thing all day long.”

Many people I know have said this same thing to themselves at one time or another. But the difference between Sawbones and most people is that he is not afraid to tackle new challenges, even if those challenges involve tense attorneys and testy horses. So think about Sawbones the next time you’re confronted with a new opportunity. Even if the job or project doesn’t work out the way you expected, you might end up with good fodder for airport conversation.

Copyright, 2005, Shari Caudron.

Shari Caudron is an award-winning columnist, writing coach, and author of “What Really Happened,” a collection of humorous stories about the lessons life teaches you when you least expect it. Shari regularly delivers speeches to women’s groups about how to transform ordinary experiences into opportunities for personal growth.
Website: http://www.sharicaudron.com
e-mail: shari@sharicaudron.com

May 22, 2006, the 109th Congress 2nd session declared June as Internet Safety Month. Recently, the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children and Cox Communication released a highly disturbing survey of youth between 13 and 17 years old about their use of the Internet.

4 percent of the children questioned have had face-to-face meetings with people they met on the Internet. Even one teen meeting a stranger is one too many.

30 percent said they have considered meeting someone face-to-face who they know only through the Internet.

71 percent reported receiving messages online from someone they didn’t know.

45 percent said they have been asked for personal information.

Children have a false sense of safety on the Internet these survey authors posit. It is a common belief among teens that if they use a chat room nickname, people they chat with won’t know who they are. This is not true. It is easy to find a person’s name, address, school and personal data from the nickname. However, a false sense of safety on the Internet isn’t the real issue as to why a teen would be willing to chat with a stranger on the Internet and in 4% of the cases meet the Internet stranger. A child who develops a connection with an adult on the Internet is seeking something which is missing in his/her life.

For example: A child who is painfully shy and fears meeting new people. Whenever it is time for recess, s/he goes off on his/her own, and does not play with the other children. Thus, she/he avoids having to talk to anyone new, and consequently avoids the anxiety associated with new encounters. Child predators know the perfect questions to ask or statements to make to a would-be target to determine if the teen is a child who is seeking something which is missing in their life. They offer love, excitement, physical, emotional, and material comfort, and the means to escape from reality. These can all be rewards. If a child wants these rewards and learns that the Internet ‘friend’ (predator) will allow him/her to escape, or receive love, or have a lot of fun, she/he will probably turn to the Internet the next time she/he feels these needs. This becomes reinforcing, and the cycle continues.

The list of tips for parents to protect their child on the Internet implies a predator could reach through the Computer screen and pull the child into an abyss. These tips include:

Create house rules. Create simple, easy-to-read house rules about using the Internet and post them on or near the monitor. Enforce these rules.

Consider security software for your computers.

Create passwords. Put Internet accounts in the parent’s name, controlling passwords and using blocking and/or filtering devices.

Don’t be afraid to ask your children to show you their favorite web site and chat rooms. Know with whom your children are exchanging e-mails and chatting.

Understand the lingo. Instant messaging has its own language.

Stay alert for warning signs. Be suspicious if your child minimizes the screen when you walk into the room. Be alert to any indication that your child does not want you to know what’s going on online. http:www/azag.gov/childrenspage/index.html

The best tip to protect your child from any would-be child Internet predator is to provide them with the love, nurturing, guidance, connectedness and time they need to thrive in life. The guidance they need regarding Internet conversations, no matter the web site is the same as when a stranger calls on the phone or rings the doorbell.

Never tell a stranger on the Internet any personal informationthe same as NEVER telling anyone on the phone that they are home alone or reveal any identifying information.

Never trust a stranger on the Internet no matter how kind or friendly they seem to beor if they tell you, “I know your Mom/Dad.”

Never meet an Internet friend (stranger)the same as NEVER opening the door to a stranger.

Dorothy M. Neddermeyer, PhD, author, “If I’d Only Known…Sexual Abuse in or Out of the Family: A Guide to Prevention, specializes in Physical/Sexual Abuse Prevention and Recovery. As an inspirational leader, Dr. Neddermeyer empowers people to view life’s challenges as an opportunity for Personal/Professional Growth and Spiritual Awakening. http://www.drdorothy.net